The Gardener is Back

Meanwhile, and it had to happen sooner or later with the first hint of spring, Dion, the creative gardening salesman is back.  Like I can afford him, but it is a small town, and he makes his rounds…


Allo Meez!”

Hello Dion.”

Jou know, I passa by jour house and I looka in jour yard and AEEE….jou know what I see?”

No Dion, what is it?”

Jou have a duh WEEDS!”

Oh say it isn’t so…..”

Jess, jou have a duh weeds. But don’t a worreee. Cauz I canna spray a duh weeds. RRReel Good for you.”


Jess, jou need to spray a duh weeds cauz dhey weel multiply. Like a flies. I canna spray a bugs too. If you wanna I can a give you a duh speeshul price. Jus for you.”

Hmmmm I don’t want a spray to kill the grass?”

Oh No Meez, no kill a dee grass. Don’t a decide a right now. Cauz I hafa go. I go to work over there and uh I come back a talk to jou about jour weeds. And jour bugs. Jus don’t leave a duh weeds. They get reel bad reel fast.”

Okay Dion, so you are going to work over…”

Jess Dion goes over there and I do a work real good.”

Real Good? Got it, yeah….okay…..”

And Dion rides off into the sunset. Later that afternoon, I see Dion in his pickup truck with two very large standard poodles perched beside him. Obviously he is taking Mrs. Gordon’s dogs OVER THERE to get groomed. Let’s hope they come back, curls intact…..I duck onto a side street in hopes that he doesn’t see me and be reminded that we have unfinished business….  


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